Confession time: I’m not emo. Or at least, I’m not as emo as you might think. Looking back, most of my posts here on KPOP Fridays have been based on sad songs. I don’t see that as a bad thing, but I do want to clarify: that’s not the only emotion I enjoy in songs. There’s a lot that can be learned from sadness, but happiness and joy hold their own unique lessons too. So, let’s try talking about her, why don’t we?
What was your first crush like? I imagine it took place a while ago. Maybe before you were a teenager? That weird “on-the-cusp” age when you start feeling those body changes? Think back: what were they like? Was she pretty? Did he have a cute smile? What made that time so special? Looking back, my first crush seemed so special because she was different from the other girls. A firey blonde with an independent streak, she brightened up rooms and my heart alike. While my love for her might not’ve had the best grounding, it still holds a place in my heart. So often we talk about the responsibilities of love, but today we’re gonna discuss the experience of it, guided by none other than VROMANCE.
Unlike most groups, VROMANCE wasn’t really much of an independent start. Their 4-man group was created in response to the success of their elder sister group, MAMAMOO, which had debuted earlier in 2014. Establishing themselves as strong vocal perfomers, MAMAMOO has been the rising star of the KPOP world (almost on the level of TWICE, I’d say), giving VROMANCE some big steps to follow. Fortunately, they’ve got the talent to back up their stylish looks, and the group can definitely lay down some jams.
She is a song that transcends so many barriers with its central theme. Rather than focusing just on one aspect of the rose-colored, sweet-things flavor of love, it embraces and celebrates all of it. From the first tingly, heady days of infatuation to the mature, deep, long-lasting embraces of marriage, She is a celebration of love, put to a beat both retro-infused and packed with funky freshness.
One, a comfortable friend
Two, a friend I get along with
You’re a girl who is a friend
But why do you look so pretty today?
My heart is fluttering, why am I being like this?
One, two, three, action
Ascending curtain, enter the lover stage right. He walks with his friend. Talks with her. Sharing life, enjoying goodness. Time passes, things begin to change. Emotions are a slippery catwalk, and untethered affections sometimes wander past the field of friendship. Right off the bat, VROMANCE get to the root of what makes love grow: relationship. Real love isn’t a weed that sprouts easily and dies easily: love needs time to develop. Starting small, eventually blossoming into something new. As with all change, it brings with it confusion, even anxiety. Yet it’s necessary, for the good its’ caretaker, to allow it to mature.
It feels different, she
Your thin ankles, she
Your mysterious face
A girl who is a friend
I was so comfortable with you
I didn’t know I’d see you as a woman, she
I keep smiling, she
I have fallen for you
Not a boy who is a friend but a boyfriend
Carefully transitioning into the joy of intimacy, the relationship has been reborn. Mutually enjoying this love, the couple not only has renamed their status, but is starting to get to know each other in a deeper level. Referencing her ankles and her face, the singer reinforces that he’s taking note of areas of her that he didn’t pay much attention to during the friendship phase. Notice his focus on her: his motivation is not on how she makes him feel, but on his journey towards understanding her. Love is never inward-focused: rather, love’s motivation Is the well-being of another. To love is to cherish, to enjoy, to seek out, and to esteem above oneself. It’s a journey, one that VROMANCE is very intentional about conveying through the music video.
Far too often in Christian circles, I fear we stray from talking about love as an experience. We talk a lot about what it is, how to do it, what it isn’t, what the consequences of misplaced love is, but we rarely discuss the goodness and joy of love itself. Between friends or lovers, it truly is a wonderful thing to love someone else, and the Bible affirms that. The love between David and Jonathan, the Prince and the Powerhouse, was the stuff of legend! The intimacy of Solomon and his wife through the Song of Solomon echoes of the love between Christ and His people, and is portrayed as a beautiful thing.
If God is love, and we are God’s people, shouldn’t we be the greatest conduits of love in this world? In all of our relationships, romantic or platonic, with those of faith and those outside of it, we should express a deep, compassionate, grace-fueled love that can only come from God Himself. It is a good thing to know of God’s love, but it’s an even greater thing to revel in the experience of it. Know the joy He finds in you, the desire He has for your good, in all cirumstances. His love pushes us to love, and to love the act of loving.
Where does that leave us? Dancing to the tune of our own drum, looking for that perfect “love experience”? No. Love is the sum of its parts, and there are different levels of love, just as there are different levels of relationship. But like a long-held relationship, the trusting ties of love need to be continually refreshed, experienced, in order to stay fresh and whole. As we love God, as we enjoy one another, even as we smile at our neighbor or lend a hand to a classmate, let us enjoy love. Cherish what it brings, accept what it means. Give, and you’ll be surprised what you receive.